Hey Its me again. Well I know what your thinking.. Im writing again because of her, bakit ba mahal ko eh! Hehe peace! Jess bless.. Well Im gonna try something different, why don’t I tell you something bout my day then bout her, aryt? So to save space I combined two entries as I feel the mood to write a lot. Ok so here goes… ( Guys sorry but its long coz I can sleep yet its past the time when ghosts appear) but I promise you will learn a lot! =)
Well I went to the 1st Asian Strategic Marketing Convention of the Philippine Marketing Association in PICC, and I really learned a lot from that experience. First I realized that even in the professional world, “Filipino time” is not something new. I got agitated cz it took an hour longer for the program to start. I was so early (Wow ako bat oh) so I went to starbux in Macapagal and I actually felt that I am into the corporate thing coz I was in coat and coffee reading news paper haha.. Then I went back to PICC and when I got there, to my surprise, man there are a lot of people. All walks of life from across the thousand Islands of our country. Luckily I sat in a table with other people (hun guys ha) and I knew they were Lasallians coz one of them was holding a flow chart (Yes Dlsu peeps, enrolment na sa Monday) Later on two people joined our table from Aquinas Legazpi, two more from Lasalle and two from Bicol. Talk about mix nuts. We all got acquainted and got along. I thought I was a gonner and cant take the silence coz it kills me hehe. The program went on and it was really great! worth an experience putting in my resume. The people who gave talks were very amazing and might I say really professionals. They were good in addressing their points and gave us tips how it is in this modern and cruel business world. The Best talk was titled Take the Dream for a Ride by Chit Pacita. She is the Marketing Director of Figaro coffee and one of the seven partners who created this company. Her talk was so inspiring because it was more personal. Just like in my days experience hehe. No seriously, it was enjoyed by all of the delegates because simply, people can relate. Allow me to share you my dear friends a portion that struck me in her talk:
“Learning should not be confined in the classroom. Never get carried away by peer pressure of people who tells you to go through this course or job because that is where the money is. Take the chance to get other jobs, challenge yourself no to be the same go and try something different. Youth allows you to develop a sense of adventure. The joy of discovery allows you to dream bigger. When you have a dream, DON’T listen to anybody, go for your dream! Live that dream, while your young.”
Now tell me that moved mountains that caused earthquakes and build rainbow bridges in your mind now! Hehe... Actually I’m happy in knowing that my life is adventurous, especially in my relationship Jess gave me such wonderful gifts in my life, yet I complain noh.. but I say sorry every night.. Well the conference was so huge that thousand of students attended and I heard names of schools that I didn’t think that excited both metro and province. Well the conference was not as professional as I expected because there were people who came in smart casual wear in which my professor told me, and there are some who attended wearing shirts, rubber shoes, and one jipjap and sporty! Well at least now I know how mixed the world can be. It was fun I also learned about E-marketing, the mobile world, global branding, 100 top advertisements etc.. and I don’t think you want those kinda stuff here hehe.. =)
It was tiring but Im delighted because Im gonna see.. yes! You know who! My princess Tessa ( tums sorry talaga una kame eh hehe) Well things didn’t go in plan but hey we still got together. She laughed at me when she saw me in my corporate look and I looked like a father bringing his child to school coz shes wearing a typical college student with matching backpack. We went to AC coz she promised to her friends she would. We had little misunderstandings bout we fixed it. (galing ni jess) met up with tums and was tempting her not to practice na and come with us hee hee me little demon.. But as what Jess did in temptation, she denied all my temptation! Wah! Hanep! Hehe.. So walking back to greenbelt, it was hard for us coz its raining. We texted bianx and mike if they want to join us for Redbox! To our dispute, we were left alone so we decided to cut time till 730 coz she has a talk in AC at 8 for some leadership for the lower batch.
Yey redbox for the two of us for the 2nd time na! (We had one na before) It was fun at start coz we viewed videos, pigged out with pasta and chicken, and simply enjoying the time with each other. The important thing is to spend time with the one you love, even without showering her with gifts and riches. For me it is fine because we have ourselves alone (amin na un ibang kwento ha hehe) and for me, I am happy with our quiet and joyful world together. Now the sole reason why I made this entry…
Yes.. all the joy and laughter together, Jess had to turn the table around and balance things.. My nightmare again has haunted me and a fight again has shaken the volcano ready to erupt. This time for me the after effect is big time. Have you ever experienced in your life having the same sick thing over and over again almost and you get really sensitive on the matter na.. you try to understand the thing and then when it comes back it already makes you wanna puke? That’s how I feel.. Thought run into my mind.. why ohh why Jess.. We say we love each other and we hurt each other?? Simply it is not enough for me anymore. Remember she said we are like this because were going deeper to the relationship? I refuse to accept it coz I feel were not going deeper but further away.. There I snapped. The stirring echoes of sweet giggles and laughter were shrouded with silence, then high tone voices blurting argument, dashing the mad eyes I cant stare in her eyes anymore.. Its like I don’t want to see her look because Im used to a happy, pretty and joyous face that me and everyone loves.. I felt nothing anymore is gonna happen. I just want to end it, All of this crap fights. I just gawked at thin air and cant really sink in what is happening to us.. Why us hun?
I cant move, I kept on starring, I cant feel, I cant think, my brain secures no thoughts except the thoughts of bodily functions ofcors. Then I said, I can say, write, do the saddest things I can imagine right at this moment… is this the end? Now heres how Jess now works… Remember pride? It’s a gonner! First time I felt that she had given it all up.. man.. whattah sight.. a sight I cannot forget the feeling. As in she’s do that for me? showing me how much she loves me and tears from her started falling.. and Just a normal being like me to be treated so importantly loved by some amazing woman.. wow.. I tried moving but I cant. She carried all my sadness and pushed me to go on and she said Kaya natin toh hun.. I denied her but she kept on going.. We had to go coz her talk starts in 10 minutes.. I really cant go on.. I wanted a car to just hit me or just stay in redbox.. but she said no and she fought it for me… once in my life a girl did that for me.. I cant walk properly coz, one Im numb of what has happened to us, two because my thighs are killing me coz I played football the other day and it was hard play. She literally pushed me, guided me the way walking together so she can reach AC. It was drizzling so it was hard pa ng onti. She wanted to held my hand but I was too numb, I wanted to hun pls don’t feel I don’t. She held on to it so tight like a favorite toy. She kept on saying she loves me and moving words. For once, I was silenced. Awed I am and was just listening to her for a while… I was muffled coz damn this girl loved me so much. My past life has never been like this, now I asked myself, Martin is this going to be another used to be?
Then the burst of energy came to me knocked me awake and I managed to come to my proper senses. It is enough that my baby showed me the way and it is my task as a man to finish it and we will work together. I had to overcome this walk and do what I do best that Jess blessed me with.. Love… His great love.. I held her face and saw the smile at her face again… I dashed a smile to.. and said my best thank you to her… I can manage na… Man she took good care of me… now she has really done it.. she gave me what I wished for.. I just had to fix it my part coz she said she cant go on with the talk and its about Jess na kame not ok plus our relationship is on Jess so how can she manage.. so I did cleaned it na.. Guys and girls.. you know what.. sitting right in front of this tube and typing the most craziest thoughts and sharing this with you now, makes me realize one thing.. there is no greater feeling with working hard for one thing you really treasure. We really worked hard for our relationship and we feel that it is the best thing we have in our life which is true. For the guys out there who complain much about ur girlfriends, wives for some like me, or your partner.. think.. you have not yet done enough.. don’t think that you’ve done it already and then stop then expect. Think that how can I make new things everyday.. Im gonna make something like spiderman.. ”Great love comes with great responsibilities.” If you dream of a good relationship, work hard and be responsible for your actions towards her. Jess gave her to us simply because He wants us to find him, well in a female form so it would be logical and rational for us hehe.. That’s what I found with my princess.. I really see jess in her.. my eyes had seen the invisible, brain had thought of the unthinkable… I am happy now not only because the after effects of the fight we had, but simply because both souls are trying to work together now.. kaya nga naging kayo kasi kayo hindi ikaw o siya.
As we took a walk that we would remember in our whole life together, we found the joy in living our youthful lives today, may it be the love we share, or the pains we bear. We have a dream, that is to have a life together, and that is what we would work on. Bun, our first promise, walang iwanan.. we will keep it talaga. When you stumble just like what happened to me, Im going to be there. That’s what partners do right? Watch each others back..
I say this oftend, when I have the chance, everyday and quite ur familiar with it.. but do know that the meaning doesn’t fade and the vigor of it simply never simply grows more…
I am you… I love you… no matter what..
Currently listening to: The Reason by Hoobastank
Currently feeling: fanTESSAised
